The guy who invented instant noodles is a damn genius. You require no special ingredients, skills, tools, patience or even a brain to make them. You just need water, and seeing as how the human body is made up of around 70% water, everyone should be able to eat instant noodles. Unless you’re like, in a blazing hot dessert and dehydrated to the point where you’re hallucinating and dying. But even then I’m sure the dry block of noodles would taste alright? I haven’t tried it, but I’m sure it would be like some kind of cookie… but more convenient, because it’s “instant”.

I like to call instant noodles ‘hero food’. No, not because it gives me the power to shoot laser beams out of my eyes and fly (that’s what magic mushrooms are for). I call it that because they’ve saved my life so many times, from assassination attempts, explosions and occasionally starvation.