Do you know what I like about Psychology? It’s the most straight talking, blunt subject you can take in school. If it was a person, it would be Simon Cowell, except instead of just making you want to die by destroying your dream for fame, he would kill you in your sleep. That’s how intense psychology is!

Tomorrow, I have a psychology exam which I’ve failed a record breaking, ego crushing number of times and the subject is closely related to exam time; stress. We’ve all experienced some stress during exam time… and you would have good reason to.

Because you’re going to die.

You see, stress lowers the level of natural killer cells by secreting all these nice hormones into your blood and studies have shown that to be especially true in students taking exams. This means you’re going to catch infections, viruses are going rape your immune system and if you’re lucky enough to have a tumour, it’s going to grow faster. You’re more likely to suffer from coronary heart disorder (which I bet hurts) and find your new (and last) home is the inside of a hospital. Prepare to be very sick and eventually, drop dead.

Coming to the realisation that the stress you’re getting from the fact you know you’re going to fail the exam is going to kill you will probably make you even more stressed. Which is only going to speed up the process and shorten your time on this world!

Psychology isn’t going to tell you “it’ll all be okay” or that “you’re going to do great!”
Psychology gives you a cold, hard slap across the face, shakes you until you’re almost unconcious and hands you a loaded gun. And then uses hypnosis to make you shoot yourself.

You’re going to fail, and then you’re going to develop coronary heart disorder, you little bitch! Haha, maybe you should have stuck to a real science… like Biology!

says psychology.

This is proof that not only do exams dramatically decrease your lifespan, but taking psychology is pretty much suicide. Recent findings have shown that most emo people take psychology, probably for this exact reason.

Also, famous psychoanalisyst, Sigmund Freud says you want to have sex with your mother and kill your father.
If you don’t want to die after hearing that, you’re probably already a corpse.